Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Leave Lee Ryan Alone!

He's sleasy and cheesy, but at the end of the day he's harmless, and those two young women were just as bad as he was. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but it isn't exactly romantic for one young lady to get "turned on" by squeezing a man's spots, and another to as him if he wants a blow job--and then complain when he reacts like most men would!

But sending him death-threats, that's snake's belly low. He hasn't harmed anyone.

I've a had a couple myself, this week. Not much new there, then. A filthy-mouthed Irishwoman who I won't name, save that she's a friend (when she's not attacking her) of our old favourite, Dockyard Doris, who came banging on my door a couple of years ago and of whom Mrs B observed, "If I'd have known she was taping it on her phone, the phone would have gone down the grate, and her after it!" Mrs Spud, who I'm not saying is lacking intelligence although she does make thicker chips, and by way of using a variety of expletives and spelling none of them right, says she is going to come here to hit me over the head with a shovel. And like DD, she makes a few comments about my wife. Do I call the cops? No, I just make sure that there is something behind the door.

The only way to deal with these people, and my advice to Lee, is to ignore them. Well, one can send someone around to their door with an even bigger shovel, but that would only damage the shovel because the skulls of these people are so thick, and when you get to the inside it's usually an empty space.

Thirty, forty years ago it was a different story: the odd dog-lead here, the odd knuckle-duster there, or Cousin Jack offering to break the odd bone. Nowadays I prefer the "romantic" approach. It's non-violent, and its fun. You close your eyes and you envisage these middle-aged, vituperative harpies--bloated and floating atop a stagnant pool, having been poisoned by their own vitriol, their rheumy eyes gaping up at the darkened clouds while the crows encircle, wondering if it will be safe to peck them to bits. And if Lee Ryan is like me, he'll put these attacks to good use and earn money from them.

I even feel a story coming on... 


Lee Ryan: I've had death threats


Lee Ryan claims he has had death threats since leaving the Celebrity Big Brother house.
The Blue singer angered some viewers for kissing and cuddling both Casey Batchelor and Jasmine Waltz while he was in the house, leaving Casey confused about the status of their relationship.
Lee told Channel 5 News: "I've been having death threats. Yeah, which is not nice. They've been saying pretty bad things - like threatening me with my life.
"I've had one person saying, 'If I see you I'm gonna stab you, I'm gonna, like, axe you in the head.' I mean I understand people are upset but to threaten me with my life. This is just ridiculous.
"I mean, I haven't hurt anyone in a malicious way, I've just got myself into a situation that I couldn't really get out of. I understand people are upset but that's a bit too far."
He added: "I think that it's, yeah, obviously I take responsibility for my actions. But I think I was confused myself if I'm honest. That's what I hand on heart would say - that I was confused by the situation as well. And I think I was getting mixed messages of honesty."
Meanwhile, American model and actress Jasmine has told ITV's Lorraine that while she is looking forward to seeing Lee outside the house, she is not in love with him.
She revealed: "Of course [we'll talk] yes, I'm excited for that and nervous. Am I in love with him? No, I wouldn't say I was in love with him.

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